Here is Doug Kass' latest: "The Day the Market Died" (to be sung to the tune of Don McLean's " American Pie" and with special recognition to Sean Brady and Tom Kearney who originally presented this concept after the Nasdaq blew up in 2000). Have some fun and sing along! A long, long month ago I can still remember How the market used to make me smile What I'd do when I had the chance Is get myself a cash advance And add another social media stock to the pile But Whirlybird Yellen began to make me shiver With every speech that she delivered Bad news on the global growth front Still I'd take one more punt I can't remember if I cried When I heard about the lowly CPI But you could lose your capital and your bride The day the market died So bye bye to my piece of the pie I poured my paycheck into the Russell Now my cash account's dry It's just one month from a new all-time high And now we're right back where we were in July We're right back where we were in July Did you buy stocks you never heard of? LinkedIn at $230 or above? 'Cause the shoe shine boy told you so Now do you believe in Home Depot? Can Berkshire save your portfolio? And can you teach me what's a P/E ratio? Well, I know that you were leveraged too So you can't just take a long-term view Your broker shut you down No more margin could be found. I never worried on the whole way up Buying Tesla from the back of a pickup truck But on Friday I ran out of luck The day the market died I started singin' Bye bye to my piece of the pie I poured my paycheck into the Russell Now my cash account's dry It's just three weeks from a new all-time high And now we're right back where we were in July Yeah, we're right back where we were in July Now for 20 days, we've been on our own And my E-Trade broker probably won't pick up the phone But that's not how it used to be When investors snapped up another bubble With cash they borrowed easily And a quote that flashed up permanently green Oh, and just as things were turning 'round Putin slapped the Ukraine down The courtroom was adjourned A Bear Market verdict was returned And while the EU read a book on Marx Buffet smirked and Chanos barked While the bears sang dirges at "The Ali Blah Blah Top" The day the market died I started singin' Bye bye to my piece of the pie I poured my paycheck into the Russell Now my cash account's dry It's just three weeks from a new all-time high And now we're right back where we were in July Yeah we're right back where we were in July Manic panic, it's just like the Titanic Unsinkable and now problems well beyond the Atlantic The Dow was at 16,500 but falling fast On "Squawk Box," Tom Lee landed foul on the grass While Joe and Becky were still trying for a forward pass With Larry Kudlow on the sidelines in a cast Now "Fast Money's Halftime Report" air was filled with sweet perfume But Mr. Market wasn't playing the Najarians' marching tune The bulls all got up to dance Oh, but they never got the chance! 'Cause the bearish players took the field As the long bond fell another 50 basis points in yield Was mean regression ever really repealed The day the market died? I started singin' Bye bye to my piece of the pie I poured my paycheck into the Russell Now my cash account's dry It's just three weeks from a new all-time high And now we're right back where we were in July Yeah we're right back where we were in July Oh, and suddenly we're underwater Billionaires all hot and bothered With no cash left to buy again So come on, Fed be anxious, com-pen-sate By lowering to negative the fed funds rate 'Cause easy money is a bubble's only friend And as I watched the indices fall I received the dreaded margin call No broker born in hell Could make me want to sell But as my gains fell fast into the crash E-Trade began demanding cash The talking heads were talking trash The day the market died They were singing Bye bye to my piece of the pie I poured my paycheck into the Russell Now my cash account's dry It's just three weeks from a new all-time high And now we're right back where we were in July Yeah we're right back where we were in July I met a strategist, the market's most optimistic equity muse I asked him for their earnings news But he just smiled and turned away I logged on to the trading floor Where I made my fortune weeks before But they demanded to see cash before I played And on T.V. the ticker streamed Stifel's Bannister cried and the short sellers dreamed Not a bullish word was spoken The daytraders were choking And the three stocks I acquired last GoPro, Netflix and Comcast Couldn't catch a bid and faded fast The day the market died And they were singing ... Bye bye to my piece of the pie I poured my paycheck into the Russell Now my cash account's dry It's just two weeks from a new all-time high And now we're right back where we were in July Yeah we're right back where we were in July Source: Doug Kass of Seabreeze Partners Management